Holding on

IN ONE of my pilgrimages, we had an elderly couple who were always holding each other's hands. Everywhere we went, the man would hold his wife's hand, help her and lead her. It was such an inspiring sight, especially to see the man with a cane on his left hand holding on to the wife with his right hand. One morning, I told him how edified I was to see them so sweet and so loving, holding on to each other after all these years. The old man looked at me with a blank stare and said "Father, kung bibitawan ko ito, babagsak ito e (Father, if I let go of her, she'll fall)!"

* * *

In today's Gospel (Jn. 20, 19-31) in spite of their fear of the Jews, the disciples held on to their belief in the Resurrection. Their doors were locked, but their hearts were open. The whole world was against them, but they held on to the Lord, and to each other. Their faith was still very fragile, but they held on. Yes, they witnessed the signs, but, more than these, it was Jesus' presence that made them strong.

* * *

Have you ever experienced a moment in your life when there was literally nothing to hold on to and yet you held on because it was the only thing you could do? Or perhaps, it was the right thing to do? Those were moments of faith, moments of courage. Let it not be said of us that we held on only when we were sure, because there were no risks involved, or because it was the easy thing to do. Today, ask yourself, why are you holding on to whatever it is you are holding on to?

* * *

Last Holy Week, I was talking to a woman who held on to her baby. Six months ago, she found herself in a difficult predicament, but she chose the way of the cross instead of the quick fix. She held on, she said, because it was the right thing to do. For once, she wanted to do something right in her life, even if that meant facing an uncertain future and unfriendly people. As we talked, I could feel the inner joy that surpassed by far her fears and insecurities. This was a woman who was at peace with herself, with her God and with the world. The amazing thing is that she had forgiven those who wronged her. And, most of all, she had forgiven herself, too. Six months ago, she was a mess. Today, she is "over the hill" because she obeyed and climbed her calvary, every single step along the way. It was Holy Wednesday when we had that talk, but as I remember it now, it was already an Easter morning.

* * *

The movie "The Passion of the Christ" made many of us realize the untold physical and emotional pains Jesus went through for us sinners. What struck me though was the determination of Jesus to go through the whole thing. He knew it was his mission to die. He held on, because it was his Father's will. It was pain to the max. It was also holding on and obedience to the max. Even Mary-especially Mary-accepted everything in obedience. May we all become more obedient. May we all live more God-driven lives.

* * *

Another person who held on is Fatima, the 10-year-old, five-times-a-day dialysis blind girl whom I wrote about some months ago. Because this little girl believed and trusted, she is now a kidney recipient, and recovering very well. This little girl, with the trust and hope and courage she has displayed, is really amazing. Now, she is asking another impossible thing-sight. But again, for those who believe and hold on, nothing is impossible!

* * *

Like Thomas, we must learn not to hold on to our doubts, our fears and insecurities. Fear is useless. What is needed is trust. Down the line, we must make a checklist of what or who we are holding on to. Why hold on to those that destroy us and destroy our peace? If you hold on to power, sin, vices, you will surely destroy yourself and your peace.

* * *

Let us ask the risen Lord not only to help us know what we are holding on to, but also to help us see why we are holding on. Furthermore, let us ask to be given the grace to know when to hold on and when to let go.

* * *

I have always found comfort and courage from these lines of Marco Sison's song "My Love Will See You Through": "When times get rough, and your dreams just fall apart, and sometimes you feel you can't go on. Be strong, hold on for my love will keep you warm through the coldest night, through the rain, through the storm. When friends turn their backs on you, and you're so helpless, you don't know what to do, I'll be on your side to comfort you, and my love will see you through." May we all feel and experience the risen Lord in our day to day lives.

* * *

Inviting you to the launching on April 24, 4 p.m. at Christ the King Seminary of a coffee-table book "Ynang Maria," a celebration of the Blessed Virgin Mary in the Philippines by Consuelo Estepa and Mary Ann Barcelona. Some of the proceeds of this book will go to our Filipino Missionaries overseas. See you!

* * *

A moment with the Lord:

Lord, give me the courage to hold on, the grace to let go, and the wisdom to know when to hold on and when to let go. Amen.