Getter or giver?

THE STORY is told about a widow who asked the family's lawyer about her late husband's will. "Your husband left all he had to the home for the aged," the lawyer replied.

"How about me?" asked the widow.

"Madam, you are all he had," was the lawyer's reply.

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In today's gospel (John 3, 16-18), we are reminded that God gave us all He had, His only Son, out of love for us. He has given us a lot of other things besides, but His greatest act of love is that He gave us His very self in His own and only Son? Are you a giving person? How much do you really give? Do you go through life giving or getting?

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Giving is the essential movement within the Trinity: the Father gave us His Son; the Son gave us the Holy Spirit; the Holy Spirit is the gift of the Father and the Son. The Trinity reminds us that our lives too must be centered on giving. True living is not about getting but giving. Are you a getter or a giver? In this life, the getters get going, but getting what, going where, we ask. In the end, it is the givers who really live and who really get going-even to eternity.

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There are all sorts of getters. There are getters who just get simply for the joy of it. And then there are getters who get, for comfort and security, because of greed. And then, there are getters who claim that they get so they can give. Okay, fine, whatever. However, may such getters be reminded that giving is not limited to material things, and that giving is not something you reserve in the end. Anyone can give himself or herself now. So, when will you finally give, and when will you finally really give yourself?

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In one of my recent pilgrimages, I met Loreta Ficarelli who knows what giving is about. She gave up the comfort of her home in Chicago to be with her two sons Dan and Philip who live in the Philippines. She could have just enjoyed her retirement and played golf the whole day, but because of love, she chose to be with her sons, especially with Philip who is disabled. Is she happy? Yes, she is happy. Very happy. Real givers are, and they will always be happy. Are you not happy? Maybe you should move on from being a getter to being a giver.

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May the Trinitarian spirit of giving permeate the hearts of our leaders. We have too many getters and pocketers in our country! We, as a people and as a nation, will never move on as long as we are led by people whose main purpose is to get more and more money from the people.

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I have often wondered how people who get what is not theirs can live with the thought that other people are suffering because of their greed and selfishness. How can they sleep at night knowing that they have deprived others of what is rightfully theirs? That's the problem with getters in this world. They have the illusion they can get away with everything in this world, and they think they can get out of this world alive. Wrong on both counts. Getters are not forever. Getting isn't everything!

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The happiest people I have met in this world are those who really know how to give. The most miserable people I have met are those who are so obsessed with getting more and more. Getters are little children who have never outgrown their greed and insecurities.

As long as one is set on the getting mode, one never really lives. For him or her, people are a means, loving is a non-issue, and sacrifice is stupidity. Too focused on quantity, he or she soon forgets quality.

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Parents, are you teaching your children to be givers? While it is true that they need to survive and earn money in this world, it is equally true that they must learn to give something to this world. They must learn not only to be wise, but also to be generous.

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Give time while you can, especially to your loved ones. Sometimes, please give them some time. Tell them that you care. Give them quality time.

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Allow me to share with you the lyrics of a song I made for Fatima Soriano, who gives her sufferings unto the Lord:

MY SUFFERING

My life is very simple
My dreams are few and little
I don't have much to offer
Except the pains I bear
Refrain:
My suffering is my offering
I'm offering all my sufferings
And if ever I will face
More trials and more pains
Then I offer them gladly again.
Refrain:
I know that there's a reason
I know I have a mission
Someday, I'll see the vision
For now, I must be strong
Refrain:
Sometimes I doubt and question
I need some consolation
But if this is my mission
I must be brave and strong
Refrain:

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A moment with the Lord:

Lord, remind me that life is not about getting, but more of giving. Amen.